The Tourist : Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

DEPP.....I had not seen him recently but something has happened to him bad plastic surgeon maybe?
On the first scene on the train he looked like Billy Cristal.If you dont believe me watch it again
I like him and he is a very good actor but he did look a bit weird..didnt he??

JOLIE -Too thin & makeup was too heavy ; particularly her eyes ...She looked like a panda bear ..
Same facial expression throughout the movie (botox maybe?)...horrible acting ..
Disapointing after an excellent perfomance in the changelling..

Hope they choose a better movie next time

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Sorry, no plastic surgery. Perhaps a makeup department trying to convince us he's an ordinary looking guy?


Yes, you are hurting sheep by hoarding them.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

She looked like a bobblehead

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Bobblehead. Hilarious and so true! Especially when her hair was up. Looked like she might tip over.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

And act horrible as well.

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Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

I think Jolie looked great -like a stylish old school Hitchcock woman, just didn't care too much about her hair. She's more beautiful with a natural hairstyle.

Depp unfortunately and uninterestingly looked excactly like what he was supposed to be playing: a math-teacher (or as this topic's creator points out: Billy Crystal!).

Bad coupling!

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

angelina jolie proves once and for all that she is nothing like old time stars as suggested here , the hideous outfit at the begining the girlie hair all a mistake. the outfits are wearing her not the other way around, Happened to see marlene dietrich in an ancient movie the spoilers, the clothes are outrageous but she donimates them because she has a stars authority, a stars presence something jolie totally lacks. the scene on the train shows how poor she is, a damp squid rather than smoulder. her verbal teasing is tiresome not that johhny depp is much help, middle aged hippies ain't atractive- time to grow up john. as for jolie watch some old movies and see what being a star actress means, the ablity to turn dross like the tourist into pure gold,

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

"middle aged hippies ain't atractive- time to grow up john"

You do realize what you're seeing on screen is the part of Frank, not the real life Johnny, right? I really do hope you can make the distinction...! Other than that, I agree - real life Johnny ought to clean up his style a bit.

"as for jolie watch some old movies and see what being a star actress means"

If it was that easy, we would all be 'stars'! Anyway, an actor/actress is only as good as the material they're given, and besides, most of those old stars you're refering to couldn't act if their lives depended on it - most of them were just lookers...

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Depp either acts in costume or as a schlub (sloppy). Not sure why he never really gets in shape and cleans up for a role. Then again, with all the women who want the guy, I guess he doesn't have to.

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Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

She looks very stylish - like a supermodel. However, she also looks like an anorexic, like a supermodel. Correction: I've seen some really healthy-looking supermodels!

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Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Well said! I'm not a fan of her but usually do think she's very very beautiful. But I did not think she was in this film. And totally felt like the clothes were wearing her here. Very much so.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Ok old timer. Stick to Fox News and O'Reilly's war stories and keep those guns handy just in case Obama tries to come and take them away!

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

@alfie, you are right about bad coupling, and it really shouldn't have been, considering Depp is naturally attractive and a damn good actor (haters who say otherwise are retarded, or have not seen:
- "Donny Brasco"
- "What's Eating Gilbert Grape"
- "Blow"
- "Fear and Loathing in LAs Vegas" (Benicio Del Toro was friggin' AWESOME in this, too)
- "Edward Scissorhands"
- "Ed Wood"
- "Chocolat"
- "Don Juan DeMarco"

... and many more). IMHO, the list above is what I use to define Depp's skills, when he has a competent director. That consideration is not trivial, given the 60-odd other films he's made that were not spectacular. And of course I left out the "Pirates of the Caribbean" franchise, "21 Jump Street" and so on, as either the writing was bad, the director sucked, or just mass media blather, and not that interesting. Obviously, "Captain Jack" (Sparrow) will be one of his quintessential characters, as he is excellent in this franchise..

And then there is "Hot Pooty & Ass Angelina, the billboard Queena" (no! Wait! That's another chick..) Seriously, Jolie is a sexy mama/ MILF (with a body you want to serve with maple syrup), although she's crazy as hell. Spoiled runts like her aren't High Maintenance, they're Astronomical Maintenance! Poor Brad Pitt (another handsome lad (with talent) that I like in a non-homo way), but I digress. Jolie can act very well - she's extremely bright & talented, when a director with the right personality is in charge (She must need a strong hand, and fast fingers....) so the problem with "The Tourist" is that the Director SUCKED. Nothing more, nothing less (and that's a lot to lose, because the success of any film relies so heavily upon this role, and in this film, there was definitely not the kind of success we should have expected.

On the other hand, maybe Jolie is a crappy lay, and after Johnny got a taste, he just didn't have the heat. Or, Depp is a crappy lay, and try as he might, he couldn't light Jolie's fire, so he scrambled while Jolie had the "devil may care, but I don't" attitude, and these issues prevented the inexperienced director. Whatever it was, we got a mediocre movie because of A-list talent delivering C-rated performances. The dailies must have uncovered this, and so shame on the producers. In the end, it was a bad coupling because the TEAM FAILED. Under different circumstances, I'd like to see what these two could be capable of. Before they get Too Old!

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Yeah. I couldn't watch the film 'cause she looked so sickly. She looks like her eyes have sunken into her face and the makeup and the big hair just made it worse.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Pretty much agree. She looks like a lollipop. She was so hot in Tomb Raider but she just got skinnier and skinner with each movie.

Stop dieting already...

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

"She looks like a lollipop."
I love it! Very funny and fitting.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Way too much makeup, way too many glamour shots.
I don't know what they were trying to do other than show off how much money they were spending on getting the shots, but it made sure that you couldn't believe her character was real, it was simply too absurd.

Do yourself a favor and watch the original, Sophie Marceau can act, Jolie can stand around with her big lipped blank face....

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

I agree. Depp looks sexier as Capt Jack.

Jolie looked terrible. She had way too much make up and her nose looked sunken. She is natural beauty and doesn't need much make-up. I though they were trying to make her look older. She reminded me of Raquel Welch.

One last thing....to many glam/beauty shots. If this movie was set in the 50's it probably would have worked.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!


One last thing....to many glam/beauty shots. If this movie was set in the 50's it probably would have worked.


Or better yet, they should have edited it in black and white.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

"Edit it in black and white"?? That's a neat trick. And 1950s films were generally shot in Technicolor.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

I don't know about Depp and Jolie, but if you're talking about horrible looking people in this movie, try Steven Berkoff! When I first saw him I thought I was going to be sick.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

It was good to see depp not looking like he normally does. The overdone makeup and hair on Jolie just made her more interesting to watch. Maybe I'm strange, I thought she looked great. Her nose looks like plastic surgery but that's fitting for her character.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

I think the Director was scared to death working with these 2 "megastars", and didn't dare to use his authority. Why, aren't they a simple mortals like himself?

Listen to your enemy, for God is talking

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Depp looked very ordinary for Depp, a little chubby in the face. Jolie looked completely unreal. Does anybody really walk the way she does in this film or pout, emote and bat their eyelashes the way she does? The acting was horrible, the script appalling, the plot just plain silly. The good British actors in the movie were totally wasted and I can only assume they all did it for the money. Why Depp and Jolie did it is anybody's guess.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Have you ever seen one of those old classic movies?
It was a throwback to old time elegance.

(although I agree that the movie didn't work at all, mess of a plot)

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Yes, I've seen a lot of old classic movies. I thought this film was trying for the tone of something like "Charade", but it failed miserably. It was a stodgy mess.

I'm afraid Depp had none of the charm and charisma of Cary Grant and I have liked Depp a great deal in other films. George Clooney would have been a much better fit for this type of role because he has a lighter touch. As for Jolie, she is definitely no Audrey Hepburn. Hepburn was beautiful, classy, but at all times very human and very real. For me, Jolie just looked...I don't know...not like a woman who could possibly exist - there was nothing inside, it was all surface. Neither actor was helped by the film being complete rubbish.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Well she exists all the same and I can't say I mind one bit. :)
I didn't have a problem with how she played it she was supposed to be that sort of beyond character and I don't think it matter that she didn't have the real touch of Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast at Tiffanys or something.

It's a bit harder for me to judge but I could certainly see how Cary Grant would've been a better fit, like how in Bringing up Baby he was kinda goofy and touching and yet still charming and charismatic and a leading man all the same, more than Depp here (not that I have anything against Depp).

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

"Depp looked very ordinary for Depp, a little chubby in the face. Jolie looked completely unreal. Does anybody really walk the way she does in this film or pout, emote and bat their eyelashes the way she does? The acting was horrible, the script appalling, the plot just plain silly. The good British actors in the movie were totally wasted and I can only assume they all did it for the money. Why Depp and Jolie did it is anybody's guess."

Couldnt have said it better myself and it made me giggle too, cuz its exactly what i was thinking. Do you remember the strut Jolie was using when she first walked into the spy headquarters to meet Bettany, omg supermodels dont strut that much on the runway... Her lipstick was pretty awful in some parts of the movie also, the movie pretty much sucked, and Depp was looking a bit chubby and a bit tired too maybe (so used to seeing him these days with all the black eyeliner as Jack SParrow).
side note, i hated Jolies British (if you can call it that accent), really annoys me when actors try to mimic other accents, cuz just never sound proper(just my opinion).

Rated the film 5/10.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!


Indeed they both looked awful because they are older and Depp is fat/hair too short,he should take a lesson from Aussie/World actor,Guy Pearce,Gary Oldman etc and stay ultra-lean.Also the film has dozens of very young actors who are thin.
Depp looks like the current Pierce Brosnan who must eat all day long and DeNiro..who should have retired in 1996..another fat man with no discipline.
My beef with Jolie is that she has an obligation to her fans..to try harder.
The women's movement funded by the Rockefeller foundatio and espoused by Gloria Steinhem created Angelina Jolie's all over this country.READ A BOOK,PEOPLE on why Gloria Steinhem was quoted as saying that if she knew what it would do to the family unit,the low/no morals of women..she would never have
started it.
Imagine a woman like Jolie who has "been"with so many men sexually....she has no morals at all.
I see the sadness in Jon Voight's face on occasion..in person..and you know that his baby girl wore the blood of that "Billy Bob Ugly"around her neck.
Brad Pitt should have married a normal secretary.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Wow! That was some raw, jealousy fueled hate!! Exactly how many men has Jolie been with sexually?

I don't love her.. She kicked me in the face!!

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

" Depp looked very ordinary for Depp, a little chubby in the face. "

I adore Johnny Depp...and think he's cute...even as Sparrow...lol... but he did look a bit too chubby in the face to make it believable that... he paid 20 Million dollars to buy that face. Why that face... it just had to be a different face...so why not a handsome youthful face...and not a wrinkled brow chubby face..

Plus for this supposedly sophisticated-looking action film...Johnny Depp looked too funny running around in those pajamas... lol Those pjs looked like they should be in a comedy... not this cary-grant-ish film.

Re: Depp looks inept in this movie!!

Both stars should have been prevented by friends and professionals from accepting this terrible script. A while back, Johnny was one of the best-looking dudes on the planet - which seems to have embarrassed him - now he's middle-aged and in this, looks really ordinary. Weird. From now on, he needs to keep his reputation by acting his little heart out. Avoiding quirky stuff like 'Pirates' (the whole world indulged him in that) and taking advice from great directors. He'll never be as pretty as he was, so it's all about acting from now on. And rejecting bad scripts! Nice guy, though.

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Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

I read somewhere that Depp intentionally gained weight for this role so that he would not look his usual beautiful self. He was supposed to look like an average Joe, not like a movie star. That was the whole point of image in the movie.

Jolie, on the other hand, could not have looked more beautiful. Granted, a little too skinny, but better than too fat, right? She was an embodiment of femme fatale, so sexy and misterious.

It's funny how we get used to a certain image of our favorite actors and instantly resist any transformation they go through on the screen for a particular character.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

I couldn't have said it better, dragon_beauty.



The years no doubt have changed me, sir.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Thank you! I thought Depp may have gained weight on purpose. I thought he looked very puffy and had never seen him look bad like this! I liked him in a couple of scenes but this movie was truly atrocious! I rented in it just because I was in the mood for something mindless and figured this would be perfect! To me Jolie is fun to look at--stunning--I liked the make-up and the glam. If you notice, the waiters and people around her all seemed to be blown away by her beauty. She's hard not to look at. I didn't notice that she was too skinny. The walk was ridiculous, of course as well as the "accent". It was trash. I'm kind of interested in watching it with the director's comments, but that means I have to watch it again! LOL

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Finally, someone who gets it! He was SUPPOSED to be a schlub, she was SUPPOSED to be a posh clothes horse. It was a fun little action flick with some comic relief thrown in. Too many people went in star struck,"ooo ooo ooo, it's Jolie and Depp!!" And that's why soooo many were disappointed. I'm not a big fanboy of Jolie, seen maybe four of her films (this one, Salt, Sky Capt...,Mr. & Mrs. Smith and Pushing Tin (not really HER film), but she looked quite tasty. I personally enjoyed her walk into headquarters. And yes, her waist was quite small. Just wish I had that swing in my backyard. lol

This will be the high point of my day; it's all downhill from here.

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

I quite enjoyed this movie for what I think it was - an entertaining bit of fluff, not much more.

That said I have to agree with the OP. I found it a bit jarring and it pulled me out of the movie enough for it to be an annoyance.

I presume Depp's make up was to try and make him look like he'd had plastic surgery to some degree and to make him look 'ordinary'. While that can be forgiven from a story-telling pov, it still felt weird looking at it.

Jolie of course has become skinnier and skinner the older she's become. While this is natural for some women, it came across as doll-like in this movie. She looked like a Bratz doll - Alien eyes and lips with no nose. They should not have shot her from behind because the fact that her butt could not fill out her dresses was painfully obvious. She looked like a little girl in Mama's clothes in those shots. I agree with the person who said her hair was all wrong - that didn't help either.

I didn't find the acting appalling but I did find that Depp stole the show. I think he should try his hand at a full blown comedy. He's really quite funny.

Peace

Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Anyone here who said Jolie looked ugly in this film are either gay or women, coz to me she looked stunning. Yeah, she is too skinny now, and thats aging her more than usual... but regardless... she's still hot.

Depp looked weird, but thats only coz the roles I usually see him in are so OTT. Pirates, Alice, Sleepy Hollow, Charlie and The Choco Factory etc... So this was the first movie I seen him where he is just normal.


Review AE http://www.reviewae.blogspot.com & http://ireview-ae.blogspot.com

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Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

This is a woman of 45 years who gave birth in 2008. Neither do I see a lack of vitality nor does she look skinny and gaunt:

http://www.imdb.com/media/rm1141881344/nm0000932


And this one was the mother of a four year old boy when she played a Bond girl at the age of 33:

http://www.imdb.com/media/rm2098567168/nm0000521

And so on.

Angelina Jolie is not the only actress who has given birth. She is just the one that makes most fuss about her motherhood.

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Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!


and this is an old photo of Sophie Mercau...

Yes, but Sophie Marceau gave birth to a boy in 1995 and the photo is of 1999.


This is a photo of Monica Bellucci in 2005 when she had a one year old child:

http://www.imdb.com/media/rm2853935616/nm0000899


My point is that a woman who has given birth does not necessarily lack vitality and look gaunt.

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Re: Depp and Jolie look horrible in this movie!!

Okay, here we go. This is Heidi Klum when she had given birth to three children. In the meanwhile she has four.

http://www.imdb.com/media/rm1327011840/nm0005099

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